विपासना एक अनुभव - एक तरी ओवी अनुभवावी सारखा...

विपासना एक अनुभव - एक तरी ओवी अनुभवावी सारखा...

हि ब्लॉगपोस्ट माझ्याच इंग्लिश ब्लॉगचा स्वैर अनुवाद आहे , माझ्या मराठी मित्रांसाठी

आज ऑफिस ला आलो ते ठरवूनच कि कोणीतरी विचारेलच, काय मग कसा होता ध्यानाचा अनुभव ? दहा दिवस जगाकडे पाठ फिरवून मी मेहनत केली आणि मी फक्त सांगेन कि "चांगला होता",  माझ्या मेहनतीशी प्रतारणा होईल ती ! माझा अनुभव माझ्याच आठवणीतून धूसर होण्या आधी मी लिहून ठेवला पाहिजे. कुणी सांगावे कुणासाठी ती प्रेरणा ठरेल जाण्यासाठी ! आणि आज ५ वर्ष मी ज्या मार्गावर चालतो आहे , त्याचा लेख जोखा नको का घ्यायला ? तर मग वाचा पुढे...

२७ जुलै ते ७ ऑगस्ट २०११

मी आणि माझ्या मित्राने हि तारीख फायनल करून टाकली कि जायचे इगतपुरी ला आणि करून बघायचे हे शिबीर. मला  आठवते त्याप्रमाणे मे महिन्यातच आम्ही फॉर्म टाकून दिले होते .. "बस कुछ तुफानी करते हैं "  आम्हाला हा रस्ता सांगणारा आणखी एक होता तो मात्र आला नाही... बरेचशे कुतूहल , काहीतरी साहस करतोय ह्या हिशोबाने निघालो मुंबईला, कारण इगतपुरी मुंबई हुन जवळ आहे. आणि ज्या पांडुरंगाने आम्हाला धर्माची पहिली डुबकी दिली तो मुंबईचाच जुना मित्र. श्री प्रतापसिंग राजपूत retd. acf  वनविभाग महाराष्ट्र राज्य. साहेबांना घेतले आणि निघालो मुंबई ते इगतपुरी कारने. त्यांना सांगितले कि बाबारे आम्हाला शुद्ध हिऱ्याचे ज्ञान हवे आहे. असे करा , तसे करा सांगणारे तर खूप भेटले , पण कसे करा हे सांगणारा अजून तरी कोणी भेटलेला नाही. सगळी दुकानं  फिरून झाली , सगळे बाबा पालथे घातले , धर्माची पुस्तके कोळून पिलोय , तुला ब्रह्म माया समजावून सांगू शकतो पण स्वतःच्या अनुभवाला काही आजून आलेली नाही... सगळे जमा केलेले ज्ञान आहे , याचे ऐकले - त्याचे वाचले पण स्वतःचे काही उगवले नाही अजून. जमीन तय्यार आहे आणि आम्ही बीज घ्यायला आलेलो आहे. आजही त्याचा हसरा चेहरा आठवतो...म्हटला तुम्ही योग्य वेळी आलात , आणि आता माझ्या सूचना ऐका. धो धो पडणारा पाऊस, मुंबापुरी कधीच मागे पडली धम्मगिरी ( इगतपुरी सेन्टर चे नाव ) पोहोचलो.

सह्याद्रीच्या कुशीत धम्मगिरी म्हणजे कोंदणात जडलेला हिराचं जणू . लखलखणारा धर्माचा ध्रुव तारा. धुवाधार पाऊस , ढगांचा गडगडाट नाही कि विजांचा कडकडाट नाही , फक्त पाऊस रात्रंदिवस फक्त पाऊस ! आम्ही गेलो ते मुळात हे नजरेत ठेऊन कि काय बरे असावे ? करून तर बघू ? खर म्हटले तर काहीच प्रॉब्लेम नव्हते आयुष्यात , पण लहानपणा पासूनच आवड होती तत्वज्ञानाची , कुणीतरी म्हणावे काय हुशार मुलगा आहे , Intellectual  आहे हो ! विवेकानंद वाचलेला होता. आणि दुःख माझ्याच वाटेला  का ह्याचे उत्तर पण शोधत होतो.  पुस्तक बरीच वाचलेली होती. कॉर्पोरेट भाषेत सांगावे तर,

"To find how mind/ body works, How I can create a harmony in life, Balancing multidimensional aspects of Health, career, goals, relations. Overall to improve my mind-matter balance and efficiency"

एकदाचे जाऊन रेजिस्ट्रेशन झाले आणि रूम मिळाली. ११ दिवस भिक्षुकांचे जीवन जगायचे आणि जगाकडे, स्वतःकडे खऱ्या अर्थाने बिना चष्म्याचे बघायचे.  कुठल्याही घटनेकडे , पात्रांकडे आपण पूर्व ग्रहांतूनच बघतो. सगळे मनाने साठवलेले रंग असतात आणि त्या रंगाच्या चष्म्यातून आपण जग बघतो , आणि नवलाची गोष्ट म्हणजे आपल्याला मुळात कळतच  नाही कि आपण बघत नसून पूर्व ग्रहांनी दूषित झालेला मन त्याच्या मर्जीनुसार आपल्याला दाखवतो आहे. आता इथे शिकायचे कि खऱ्या अर्थाने कसे बघायचे ते.

ज्या दिवशी आपण पोहोचतो त्या दिवसाला शून्य दिवस म्हणतात, ५ वाजता संध्याकाळचे जेवण झाले कि मोबाइल, पैशाचे पाकीट सगळे जमा करून दयायचे!  संन्याशी ना मग कशाला पाहिजे जगाशी संपर्क ?

रूम किंवा डॉर्मिटरी मिळते , जुन्या विद्यार्थ्यांना मात्र स्वतंत्र खोली मिळते. खायचे प्यायचे सामान जमा करून द्यायचे, गंडे दोरे, आंगठ्या, ताबीज, ताईत, बांगड्या, पायातले चाळ, तुळशीमाळ  - बाहेरचे सगळे अवडंबर काढून द्यायचे. तंबाखू , बिडी , तपकीर चालत नाही. लिहिण्याचे वाचायचे साहित्य चालत नाही.  पुरुषांची आणि महिलांची स्वतंत्र व्यवस्था , अगदी तुम्ही आई, बहीण, मुलगी,पत्नीसोबत आलेला असलात  तरी तुमची भेट ११ दिवसांनंतरच. ६ वाजता मोठ्या डिनिंग हॉल मध्ये तुम्हाला परत विचारले जाते , बाबानू ११ दिवस आमच्या शिस्तीत राहू शकाल ना ? मधून पळून जाता येणार नाही, सकाळी ४ ते रात्री ९ पर्यंत इथे तापावे लागते. ७ वाजता तुम्हाला बसण्यासाठीचे आसन  दिले जाते आणि पुढच्या दिवसांच्या सूचना मिळतात.

काय करायचे : 

संपूर्ण आर्य मौन , स्वतःशी सुद्धा बोलायचे नाही... नजर पायांकडे , सांकेतिक खुणा नाही कि डोळ्यांचे हसणे नाही., एकटे आलात ना जगात , आता एकटे राहा आणि आत पहा, अंतर्मनात काय चालू आहे ते. काही दैनंदिन गरजे  संदर्भात  बोलणे असेल तर धर्मसेवकाकडे मागू शकतात , टेकनिक  संदर्भात काही प्रश्न असलेत  तर सहायक आचार्याना विचारू शकतात. सकाळी ४ वाजता डाँग  वाजतो , पहिली घंटा वाजते धर्मसेवक उठवण्यासाठी दाराजवळ छोटी घंटा वाजवतात , उठायचे तैयार होऊन धम्म हॉल मध्ये आपापल्या आसनावर जाऊन बसायचे. ४:३० ला डोळे बंद , रात्री सांगितलेल्या सूचनांवर काम सुरु.

• ४:३० ते  ६:३० ध्यान  ( ६:०० ते ६:३० मंगल मैत्री )
• ६:३० ते ८:०० न्याहारी आणि आंघोळ
• ८:०० ते ११:०० ध्यान (८:०० ते ९:०० सामूहिक साधना धम्मा हॉल मध्ये )
• ११:०० ते १:०० दुपारचे जेवण आणि आराम (प्रश्नोत्तरांचा तास )
• १:०० ते ५:०० ध्यान (२:३० ते ३:३० सामूहिक साधना धम्मा हॉल मध्ये )
• ५:०० ते ६:०० संध्याकाळचे हलके जेवण / निंबू पानी
• ६:०० ते ७:०० (सामूहिक साधना धम्मा हॉल मध्ये )
• ७:०० ते ८:३० ( संध्याकाळचे प्रवचन )
• ८:३० ते ९:०० ( सूचना आणि मैत्री )

खूप काही शिकायला मिळाले ह्या दिवसांत , मन आणि शरीर सलग २२ तास काम करू शकतात फक्त २ तासांच्या झोपेच्या शक्तीमध्ये. आळस नाही कि निद्रा नाही. श्वास पाहता पाहता मनाला आपण वर्तमानात राहायला भाग पाडतो. 

आमच्या सोबत कोण होते ? 

४०० जणांच्या समूहात , जीवनाच्या सर्व क्षेत्रातले आणि वेगवेगळ्या वेगवेगळ्या वयाचे प्रवासी होते. पोलीस, डॉक्टर, इंजिनियर, विद्यार्थी, IITian, जुने शासकीय कर्मचारी , नवीन भरती केलेले IAS cadre, बॉलीवूड, मार्केटिंग , advt क्षेत्रातले , कंप्युटर इंजिनियर, कॉर्पोरेट जगातले VP , रिटायर्ड अधिकारी , शेतकरी, ग्रामीण आणि शहरी , शिकलेले आणि अडाणी, देशी-विदेशी, सरदारजी आणि चायनीज. सर्वच प्रकारची जनता जनार्दन मी तिथे पहिली पण हे सगळे मला कळले १० व्या दिवशी, तोपर्यंत मात्र आर्य मौन. 

विपासना काय आहे ? 

सिद्धार्थ गौतमाने हि विद्या जी अनादी काळापासून चालत आलेली होती , तिला शोधून काढली.  न्यूटन ने गुरुत्वाकर्षणाचा नियम शोधून काढला अगदी तसाच. काही नियम हे वैश्विक असतात , ते सार्वभौम असतात, कुणी शोधून  काढला तरी आणि नाही काढला तरी तो अस्तित्वात असतो. ह्या नियमाला शोधून राजपुत्र सिद्धार्थ ज्ञानी झाला, दुःखापासून मुक्त झाला. ज्याने स्वतःच्या मेहनतीने , स्वतःच्या अनुभवाचे ज्ञान जागवले आणि बुद्ध झाला. असे कितीतरी बुद्ध भूतकाळात झालेत आणि कितीतरी बुद्ध वर्तमानात आहेत आणि असंख्य भविष्य होतील. नियम सनातन आहे , अनादी आहे, त्या नियमाचे पालन करून आणि विपस्सना वापरून दुःख मुक्त , विकार मुक्त होता येते. प्रत्येकात बुद्ध बनायचे बीज सुप्त स्वरूपात असते, त्याला विकसित करायचे, ज्ञान जागवायचे. मन शुद्धीकरणाची विद्या म्हणजे विपस्सना. दुःखाचे संपूर्ण उन्मूलन करणारी विद्या.

एका गावापासून दुसऱ्या गावाला जाणारा रस्ता असतो, जोपर्यंत तो वापरात असतो तोपर्यंत तो आस्तित्वात असतो. कालांतराने त्याचा वापर कमी होतो, आणि त्याचे अस्तित्व हळू हळू नष्ट होत जाते, त्याच्यावर झाडे झुडपे वेली  उगवतात वन्य प्राण्यांचा संचार सुरु होतो आणि तो मार्गच नष्ट होतो.  विपस्सना चे असेच झाले. प्राचीन भारतातील ऋषी हे आतल्या जगाचे शास्त्रज्ञ होते, त्यांनी बाहेरच्या आणि आतल्या दोघा  जगांचा सखोल अभ्यास करून जीवनाच्या चाली रीती विकसित केल्या होत्या, कालांतराने या वापरात नसल्यामुळे नष्ट झाल्या.  बुद्धा ने शोधलेली हि विद्या इतर देशांमध्ये प्रसारित झालेली होती, तिला शुद्ध स्वरूपात ब्रह्मदेशाने सांभाळून ठेवली, पिढी दर पिढी जतन करून तिच्यात कुठल्याही प्रकारची जोडतोड न करता, भेसळ न करता ठेवल्यामुळे ती आजही तेच फळ देते जे बुद्धाच्या काळात देऊ शकत होती. 

काय असते आर्य मौन ? 

संपूर्ण शरीराचे, वाणीचे मौन. राम राम नाही , कि हाय / हॅलो नाही. खाली मान  घालून, जमिनीकडे ३-४ पाऊल अंतरा पर्यंत पाहत चालायचे. हसणे नाही कि खुणवने हि नाही. मनातही संवाद नाही..

पैशाचे बोला : १ रुपया हि नको ! धर्म शुद्ध स्वरूपात घ्या ! विकारमुक्त व्हा ! कुणाचा फोटो नाही कि कुणाचे गंडे दोरे नाही, ना हिंदू ना मुस्लिम ना बौद्ध ना ख्रिस्ती ना जैन ! राहणे खाणे आंतरराष्ट्रीय दर्जाचे पूर्णपणे फुकट ! त्यांना तुमच्याकडून काहीच अपेक्षा नाही !

असे कसे ? हे payback  मॉडेल आहे . ११ दिवस तापल्यानंतर तुम्ही चांगल्या मनाने जे दान देतात त्यावर कुना दुसऱ्याला धर्म मिळतो. नाही दिले तरी काही फरक पडत नाही त्यांना , शेवटी तुम्ही धर्म च्या दानावर राहिलात ना ! सब्ब  दानं  धम्म दानं  जनादी !

पण, खूप कठीण तापावे  लागते , कठोर परिश्रम आणि काटेकोर शिस्त - रिसॉर्ट नाही आहे तो - तपोभूमी आहे ती तापसांची.

न बोलता कसे काम चालते सगळे ? खरं  म्हणजे काहीच बोलावे लागत नाही जर तुम्ही काम करायचे ठरवले कि. मार्ग आतला आहे अडचण आली तर धम्मसेवकांशी बोलू शकता ते पण कमीत कमी. ११ दिवस तुमच्या आयुष्याचे सगळ्यात सुंदर दिवस असतात. तुम्हाला तुमची कॅपॅसिटी कळते , स्वतःची नव्याने ओळख होते, एक नवीन उमेद भेटते जगण्याचा मार्ग सापडतो , अनमोल आयुष्यावर तुम्ही खरोखर प्रेम करू लागतात. 

फायदे काय ? 

११ दिवसात फक्त कामाची क्लुप्ती कळते , काम तर जन्मभराचे आहे.  ह्या रस्त्यावर ज्याला मी राजमार्ग समजतो टप्प्या टप्प्याने ठराविक मुक्काम लागतात - अगदी प्रत्येकाला आपापली प्रगती मोजता येते, शुद्ध विज्ञान आहे.

झोप कमी होते , शरीरात प्राणाचा संचार वाढल्यामुळे निरोगी होते, रोग प्रतिकारक शक्ती वाढते, किरकोळ आजार (सर्दी-खोकल्यासारखे ) बंद होतात. मनाचे भटकणे कमी झाल्यामुळे कामाची शक्ती ४ पटीने वाढते. सगल्यांबद्द्दल प्रेम वाटत असल्यामुळे आपोआप आनंद वाढतो. आणि विशेष म्हणजे हे सगळे बेगडी नाही , वरवरची पॉलिशिंग नाही, जे आहे ते खरे सोने आहे- कुठल्याही कसोटीवर ह्या स्वतः जागवलेल्या अंतरीच्या ज्ञानाला घासून बघा...

१० दिवस घरदार सोडून - जाणे १००% उपयोगी आहे. त्याच घरासाठी मोठी ताकद मिळते.   

१८ नोव्हेंबर २०११ - एक आढावा 

परत हा माझा स्वतःचाच स्वतःशी संवाद आहे. हा ब्लॉग मी स्वतःसाठी आणि वाचणाऱ्याला प्रेरणा मिळावी ह्या उद्देशाने लिहिला होता. 

मन तोपर्यंत विश्वास ठेवत नाही जोपर्यंत ते अनुभव घेत नाही.

हा सगळं प्रपंच मनाला आपला गुलाम करण्यासाठी आहे.

नुसत पुस्तके वाचून कोणी पोहायला शिकेल का ? शेवटी तुमच्या अनुभवाचे ज्ञान तुम्हाला उपयोगाचे आहे. बुद्धाच्या ज्ञानाने एकटा बुद्धच मुक्त झाला. जो मेहनत करतो आणि या रस्त्यावर चालतो तो  आज ना उद्या मुक्कामावर पोहोचतोच. 

बुद्धीच्या क्षेत्रात मन तुमचा गुलाम नाही बनू शकत. हा नोकर जो डोक्यावर चढून बसला आहे - काही ना काही कारण काढून तुम्हाला संभ्रमात ठेवेल - शेवटी त्यावरच त्याची गाडी चालते. 

हे समजायला खूप विचित्र आहे पण एक बुद्धिजीवी, विज्ञाननिष्ठ आणि विवेकरुपी भक्तीचा मी तुम्हाला सांगेन कि ह्या अग्निदिव्यातून एकदा जा. आयुष्य बदलून जाईल. 

१० दिवस सन्याशाचे जीवन जगून तर बघा- खूप कठीण आहे पण अशक्य नाही.

"काहीच ना करण्यासारखे" काठी काम नाही. साक्षी होऊन बघा ह्या साडेतीन हाताच्या देह प्रपंचात - काहीच करायचे नाही - फक्त निरीक्षण करायचे - यथाभूत 

सद्याच्या जगात परिस्थिती अशी आहे कि साधे टॉयलेट जरी जायचे असेल तर पेपर किंवा मोबाइल हातात पाहिजे कारण मनाला एकटा राहायला आवडत नाही, त्याचा नाच तो नाचवतो आणी आपल्याला काळात सुद्धा नाही कि आपण त्याच्या तालावर नाचतो आहे ते.

५ मिनिटे जे मन आपल्याला एकटे पडू देत नाही त्याला ११ दिवस पाहणे कसे असेल ?  महावीराचे काम आहे बाबा , खूप पराक्रम करावा लागतो. मन बंड  करून उठते, घाबरवते , काहीच तिथले आवडत नाही. बाहेर पळण्यासाठी   कारण शोधते.  कमजोर मनाचे २-३ दिवसात गाशा गुंडाळून चालते होतात. 

विपस्सना मध्ये कुठलाच संप्रदाय शिकवत नाही , जो एक खरा धर्म आहे जो अनु अनुला धारण करतो जो तुझ्यात माझ्यात आणि सजीव -निर्जीव मध्ये आहे त्या शुद्ध धर्माचे खरे ज्ञान होते. टरफल गळून पडतात. 

बुद्धाने बुद्ध धर्म नाही शिकवला - त्याने शुद्ध धर्म शिकवला जो धारण करून कोणीही ज्ञानी म्हणजे बुद्ध बनू शकतो. देश-स्थळ-काळापलीकडचा अनादी अनंत इतका संकुचित असेल कि तो फक्त हिंदू किंवा मुस्लिम चा असेल ? इथे गंडे दोरे - तंत्र मंत्राला काही किंमत नाही. विद्यापीठात गणित कुठल्या धर्माचा असतो ? गुरुत्वाकर्षणाचा नियम कोणत्या देशाला लागू पडत नाही ? राग हा फक्त हिंदू ला येतो का ? 

इथे कुणाची टिंगल नाही , तुमची मते ११ दिवस बाजूला काढून ठेवा , आतमध्ये पहा - तुम्हाला आपोआप निरंजन सोही चा अनुभव येतो. दिव्य दर्शन वगैरे काही नाही - कुठला देव प्रगट  होत नाही पण आतल्या देवाचे यथार्थ दर्शन होते. कुठलेही हिप्नॉटिसम नाही कि ब्रेन वॉशिंग नाही.  इथे वेळ थांबून जातो. रोज संध्याकाळी १.५ तासाचे प्रवचन असते ते चर्चा करते कि काय करत आहोत आणि का करत आहोत.  कुठल्याच एका मताचे/जातीचे /संप्रदायाचे प्रदर्शन नाही कि दुसऱ्याचे खंडन नाही. गुरुजी जे स्वतःला फक्त शिक्षक म्हणवतात - त्यांच्या भाषेत "बाडा बंदी नाही" खरा धर्म मुक्त करतो- तो भीती दाखवत नाही तो स्वावलंबी करतो. 

आठवणीतल्या कविता

उणीव 

कवी : अनिल  

बदलले रंग आभाळाने 

पांघरून धरतीला अंधारलेणे 

विझला दिवस पळा पळा ने 

कवेत घेऊन शुक्रतारा 

अंधारल्या दशदिशा 

विसावली वेल  वृक्षा वरती 

तेथ उमलली रातराणी 

घालून साद केवड्याला 

दिनरात्रीचा हा खेळ 

लावतोय रोजच ताळमेळ 

मापता मापे ना काळवेळ 

पोरखेळ झाला जगण्याचा 

उमलतो दिवस नव्या आशेने 

फुलतो राजतरंगाने 

संध्याकाळी विस्कटून जातो 

एक तुझ्याच उणिवेने 

यक्षरात्र 

कवयत्री : अरुणा ढेरे 

पाण्यासारखे वाहते सदाचे , 

आयुष्य नावाचे खुळे  गाणे

किनारा धरून रांगत  चालला 

दुःखांचा काफिला मस्तपणे 

सुखाचेही तळ  जातांना घासून 

अस्तित्वाची खूण  कळे  मला 

दिव्यापरी  आता प्राक्तन जोडून 

प्रवाही सोडून श्वास दिला 

आणि रंगगर्द क्षितीज पेटले 

रात्री उजाडले क्षणमात्र 

तमाने टाकली प्रकाशाची कात 

झाली काळजात यक्षरात्र 

Vipassana

Vipasaana the experience:

Today morning when I came to office, this thought came to my mind, since I took 10 Days vacation,Friends will come and ask how was it and if I just say "It was good” it won't do justice to what I did In last 10 days.

27th July to 7th aug 2011:

We Went to Igatpuri myself and Amaresh (A small town near Mumbai : 2.5 hr journey by train) , situated in the middle of western Ghats of Sahyadri mountain ranges; Full of waterfalls in background as rain pours 24X7.

To find how mind/ body works, How I can create a harmony in life, Balancing multidimensional aspects of Health, career, goals, relations. Overall to improve my mind-matter balance and efficiency. 9 days we lived life of monk and learned how to see the things the way they are. No projection of mind, we see the things from our past experiences and mostly we see perceptions.

What we did: Complete silence. Not to use any way of communication (verbal/nonverbal/gesture) among us (We can ask to teacher if there is anything we need.) No news, TV, Mobile, Laptop, complete disconnect from external world/ family. Day started at 4:00 am and ended at 9:30pm mostly in a state of meditation. We sat on ground for 13hrs doing meditation (Yes 55minutes meditation + 5minutes loo break) without any back pain or body pain when we reached Day 7-10.

Schedule:

• 4:00 to 6:30 Meditation.
• 6:30 to 8:00 Bath , breakfast
• 8:00 to 11:00 Meditation.
• 11:00 to 1:00 Lunch and rest
• 1:00 to 5:00 Meditation.
• 5:00 to 6:00 Dinner and rest.
• 6:00 to 7:30 Meditation.
• 7:30 to 9:00 Discourse (Video discourse in Hindi / English)

I learned that Mind and body can work for 22hrs with just a sleep of 2 hrs, with no sign of fatigue and tiredness. Learned to watch breath and its impact on both (mind and body). Watch breath and you can master mind. It will not oscillate in Past or future; it will increase concentration and Efficiency.

What’s Vipassana: This was a technique Buddha rediscovered from ancient Indian rishis (who were scientist of inner world) and followed. This was not related to any religion; it was preserved in its true essence by a small group of Burma (Myanmar) monks and brought to India by Mr. Goenka.

Who were there with me: Group included of 400 males from all field of life / religion. Police, Nurses, Doctors, Engineer students, IITians, old Govt employees / New IAS cadres ( Govt made this compulsory as a part of their induction trg) , celebrities in show business, sales/ marketing , Software folks, VPs, Adventurers, Farmers, Villagers, literate / illiterate, optimist/ pessimist and I came to knew this only on 10th day. Only Sardarjis and foreigners (Chinese / whites) I was able to identify initially latter learned on 10th day that there were all Indians and foreigners (Hindu, Muslim, Christians, Sikhs, Jains).

What’s cost: 0 Rs. All stay, food was taken care since we were Bhikshuk. Free food and stay with ardent discipline and rigorous practice to excel.

How it works: If you benefit you donate for rest others to follow.

How they managed so many people without talking: Go and see yourself. We don’t need to talk if we want to work on something. Excellent example of discipline, dedication, devotion and believing for "Sabka mangal ho"

Well, this was experience I felt worth spending 10 days of your life dedicatedly for some purpose. More on this here

Nov 18 2011 ( Current Progress)

Writing now for those who want to progress on the path of Dhamma. Few things for those who aspire for this,

• Mind do not believe unless it experience it.
• This entire experience is to make mind your servant.
• How can you make mind servant by just reading this unless you experience it , after all
• intellectual level mind will always find a way to deny to be your servant.

Its tricky, but as a rational mind and from past experience I would say, Go try it for 10 Days. It works provided you walk on the path of dhamma everyday.

• Become monk for 10 days , live ardent life.
• Biggest challenge is "Nothing to do, Just observe, witness"
• Current state of mind you go to toilet with newspaper / mobile in hand. We are never alone, always occupied or glued to TV. So its very tough to sit silent, weak minded people run away after 2-3 days. Mind will give arguments how this is not good and why you should not do this.

Technic has got no religion involved , no mantras, no rituals, Its purest at its best.

1. Ask mind to observe breath ( 10 days you will mold him) without any thoughts.
2. Once you observe breath you start getting sensations of your own body at subtler level.
3. Keep habit of observing this changing nature of sensations , patterns as they are "Anittya" with equanimity mind.
4. In any situation of craving or aversion be just aware that it passes.

Only 4 steps, but not that simple.. Its ongoing journey. Good Luck.

Does this really works ?

My experience :

1. I am following it from 10th Aug 2011 everyday I see following changes,

1. Whenever I am depressed , happy, feared, angry, irritated I am aware. Once I start observing it , the phenomenon will not last for long and will not take control of me.

2. Sleep is reduced. Food Intake is balanced, No craving for Non-veg anymore.

3. I look forward to sit for 1 Hr.

4. Feeling happy for all , To share this to all. "Bhavatu Sabba Mangala"

Work In Progress :

• Thoughts are changing as they are Anittya, Insane --> crazy --> impure --> Normal --> Pure.
• Weight reduced by 6 Kgs in last 3 -4 months without any new diet / control.
• Dont feel to watch movies which are violent.
• Dont get irritated by kids that easily.
• Work efficiency increased 3-4 folds.
• always aware...

11th July 2012 : Lets take a stock:

I will go to another session from 25th July to 5th Aug. This time with more friends. here are few more observations:

• I find mostly talking about dhamma to everyone I meet.
• Observing part of mind is getting stronger and stronger.
• Reacting part is becoming weaker and weaker.
• Feel good about everyone. Head is much Cool now.
• Most of the time aware of body sensations.
• Anxiety,Anger reduced to a good extent.
• Thoughts are less as compared to earlier.
• Gets sounds sleep. No bad dreams which is strange.
• NO throat infection or fever in entire year ( Except once ) which is basically very common in Bangalore.
• Look forward to sit in meditation once in a day.

25th July to 5th Aug 2012:

Its been 15 days I came back from second round of Vipassana. a collegue reminded me that he wanted to read my experiences, So need to pen down.

Many things surprised me in second round. 

This time I was more prepared, more dedicated as I knew the path. I can say I followed all instructions line by line. I was able to penetrate deeper in my mind. for old students there are 3 more percepts.

to abstain from killing any being;

to abstain from stealing;

to abstain from all sexual activity;

to abstain from telling lies;

to abstain from all intoxicants.

There are three additional precepts which old students 

(that is, those who have completed a course with S.N. Goenka or one of his assistant teachers) are expected to follow 

during the course:

to abstain from eating after midday;

to abstain from sensual entertainment and bodily decorations

to abstain from using high or luxurious beds.

We observed noble silence to best of our efforts. My wife, Amaresh, his mother, his sister another colleague Satya, old friend Nandu accompanied me. 

Personal front it was a big challenge to leave kids and mom on their own. Never did such thing in past 10 years, even for a day... A sudden OFF from life for 15 days ( 11 Days course and travelling time). Funny thing is mom managed, Kids learned how to live, We learned how life goes on even without you, this was experience for wife. Generally everybody know this at  intellectual level but never experience it, so It make one always worried what will happen in my absence. 

Whole vipassana is about experiencing the things at physical level and observing as third party, that things comes and go away. Vipassana is not for picnic or spend time in vacation.Time runs slow there if you dont work on your exercise. If you work hard time fly there as well.

Wake up at 4:00, get ready by 4:25, Dhamma sevaka will be ringing outside your room. Wear ear cover cap , jacket pickup umbrella, look for sleepers ( hawai). One hand small torch and one hand umbrella start walking toward 

dhamma hall. Keep mind busy watching breathing. eyesight not more than 4 feet near feets, just to watch road.

Sit down , cover feet with warm jacket and close eyes for next 2 hrs. Initial 5-6 days I was able to sit in meditation from 4:30 to 6:30 at stretch. Prayers will start between 6:00 to 6:30 and since I knew most of the things what Goenkaji talks in hindi, I was able to related what he was saying but could imagine how hard its for the new person. I would say, his voice is melodious, cause it has purity. New student will not agree and will give me mental bashing for this. He sings, chants in such a voice that people will run away. But once you understand it, over the time you start liking it.

6:30 am will be breakfast. Being old student I will have a different entry in canteen, my queue will 10 time be shorter. I use to feel good about it but same time responsibility that I need to do it more ardently as new students are watching over me.

Breakfast, Lunch and evening snack are only get together without meditation but since everybody is in AryaMaun people avoid eye contact, do not speak , totally alone and stranger. One feel depressing there, one reason could be old 

sankara coming on surface can shake you there. you might be missing family, So best way is watch your breath , 24x7 aware. If you get lost in thoughts, mind start pulling you along with it. One thought will bring another one. 

It starts creating sankara and get itself into troubled state. I was able to pull 6-7 days without much issues.

Then come walking same way to room for bathing, alert and aware. After bath you get 20-25 minutes. Close eyes lie down on bed, observe breath , observe sensations. If you dont do that mind will wander and more it wander more 

difficult it will be for you to keep him under control. Time will not fly, Sankara which are coming on surface take you along on ride. Every morning on bed after bath, I will get strong sensations and then silently observe them they 

will pass away, "Anicca wat sankara". Intellect starts collating things (May be I was in meditation and this sankara which came on surface as result of it, passing away , I feel lighter)

9th day I was eager to meet my wife, seek her feedback, friends, wanted to speak about their experiences etc... mind started wandering already then mind do not listen that obediently... things starts drifting..again focus on breath Its battle. 

Evening discourses I listeaned for entire year ( audio rip in car) still I learn something new out of them. Only entertainment for you is evening discourses. "Sadhna ka 9 wa din samapth ho gaya, ab bache kuchh ghantoko sahi upayog)"

Mind starts bringing older deep routed sankaras, he will make you frightened, irritated, whatever he can. Just watch breath and sensations and learn that like all it also not permanent. It comes and goes away observe it patiently.

pain will be there, Joy also be there. They all are impermanent. Anitya Bodh hi jage, samta becomes stronger.

Mangal maitri, people are excited. Newer one starts breaking maun out of excitement. 10:00 am you can speak.

When you start talking freely after 10 days, You feel that when you were not talking you were much more better. Chaos starts in everywhere. You no more get to hear birds chirping except in meditation. Everybody just talks...

before somebody finishes, one start talking. subject keeps jumping, thats true nature of mind. It will not keep focus on one thing.  Entire day goes in so much talks , phone buzzing around, you feel you are tired. you eat more. 10th day first time I had breakfast and still in night I was hungry. more energy you loose, more mind gets tired more it eats.

11th day morning One get a surprise breakfast, I will not reveal it here, you also dont try to know it. people starts jumping to go home. We did much photo session. entire place feels like a sacred place, trees all fully loaded 

with fruits. nobody touches them. 24X7 rain pouring down. birds chirping, one dont want to leave that tranquil place.

How different this change ? a boring place starts, so tranquil ? Its all projection of my mind. If I am at 100% bliss I see bliss everywhere. If my mind is in fear it sees fear everywhere. I know all this at intellectual level. but 

when I experience It, Its my gyan. that's the reason one need to go there and live a prison like ardent life of bhikku.

Many words, prayers brings reference to Buddha and Pali language. One should not mix it with any religion. If you wear spectacle of religion whole things looks like religious. Vipassana teaches you to see things the way they are.

Its academy which teaches you , how one can reveal true self. Mangal Ho.

12 Nov 2013 whats status ?

Yes I am still on the path of mangal ho ! Everyday at least for an hour I will make it to sit.
Let me take a stock of the things ...

March 2013 I went 3 days course here in Bangalore. Once you do 10 days long course you are eligible to do short courses of 1 ,3,5 days etc.

Now mind is much tranquil compared to early days, impurities will still surface but will not have any lasting impact. I cant believe that I am not angry on any one for more than few hours, latter I just laugh it out.

I can drive all the way Bangalore to Pune 900 KM in stretch and still can spend hours talking there once I reach the destination. 4 hrs of sleep is enough to carry over next day to drive another 370kms. Did this twice, driven XUV 13K in last 10 months.

Work capacity has increased multifold. Our team CoE got best team award this year. We were pacesetter for this quarter.

No nostalgic trips to past or future. Just Be cool in present.

Feels good for all, I am at ease in traffic !

Less irritation with honking fellow now or not much problem with auto cutting lanes.

this all sound feel good factor but indeed cant stop writing, Not a Single , I repeat not a Single incidence of cold cough and throat infection in entire year (I am sure right from my first course), Immunity becomes strong. No need to carry mineral water to native.

Strangely not single bad dream I remember in past few years.

This list is endless. For sure It changed me inside out. I will definitely recommend it to anyone

Dont delay not sure when breath which will go out will come back or not !

Feels gratitude towards people who kept this in its pure form and gave me this without any condition apply
* clause. I always used to say "Nothing comes free in life"

"This invaluable thing came free of cost in my life and it gave me real gift which I can not repay back."

May this blog serve inspiration for those who want to taste this. May this blog serve its purpose.

Mangal Ho !!!

Date: 16th June 2014
----------------------

This is again to remind myself the thoughts going in my head before going to my third vipassana course.

I find myself talking with great enthusiasm about vipassana to whoever ask me about it.
Mind is much more tranquil and stable now. Sometime still there are little little storms but they do not affect much. Whatever  I planned for the year, including application, admission , leaves all are worked out.

Looking forward to reach to dhammmagiri on 25th with wife.

This time It tool me 1.5 year to go back. I missed last yearly course, instead I attended one 3 day course in
Bangalore. Plan is to reach 45 days course by next/second year end.

Once I am back from this course plan is to do one Seva in Bangalore and then Sattipatanam course.

I spend more time playing with kids. Able to handle most of anger moment effectively. Can feel the good things happening around and can really appreciate them honestly.

Inspirational things are happening all the time, Learned to find multiple options in solutions for same problem.

---------------------------------------------------------------
Agni Path - Path of fire...25th June To 6th July 2014
---------------------------------------------------------------

Reached Igatpuri on 25th Via Mumbai. It was humid Mumbai and sweaty Dhammagiri. We both were tired, Mind was playing 
tricks as usual. Missing family, kids

After a long Q got accommodation allotted. Since I was old student did not came much questions while verification. While filling application form meet one person who attended 12 courses in past but did not followed regular practice from last 4 years, few were old members 4-5 courses done in past were there as well. In line , came across one Old uncle must be in his 60's, I was telling him that this is not place for picnic, expect great pains, this is Tapo-bhumi. 
No matter what happens don't leave the course in between. Last day we will meet and you will be a changed person. I will not even look at you and you should also look down all the time while walking.

0th day, after instructions we were allotted the sit (Aasana), I was sitting in first row. Battle started.

- This is place for Tapa, and I have come here for Tapascharya.
- I have promised my little one that we both (Mom and Dad) will not leave him at same time henceforth.
- Each minute is important for me. If I am not doing what I am supposed to do here, I am wasting his golden time.
- Every day is a new challenge, Mind keeps tricking you and you need to be on track. Follow instruction given 24X7.

In a time of break also you need to work on the task given, If you don't then you will be derailed by mind. 

Thinking Vs Sajagta.
First day itself it created a fear psychosis in me that this time I wont last till 2nd day. First day was Longest day.
"Sadhna ka Pahela din khatam hua ab kam karnekeliye ..."
How I am going to complete remaining one ?
Why do I get such thoughts when I already thru this path twice.
Old sankara's coming up surfacing on body - Hail pain - manifesting in all possible way on all over body. Only few thoughts passes...

- Tapane aaye hain Chhutiyya manane nahi.(Came here to face the problems not to enjoy my vacation)
- Main tapane aaya hun vyakul hone nahi.
- Vikaroko bhagana hain, Vyakul hona out of question.

Battle - Everyday starts by 4:00 and ends at 9:15. Morning starts with a thought today I will fight like a legend of Mahabharata
(Bhishma, Bhima, Krishna each one for passing day) 
By evening you are exhausted. Guruji's discourse works as medicine, Inspirational truly. I have listened each line at least 10 times in last 2 year but every time it resonate with me with a deeper meaning.

Its a Path of fire, I see people literally burning deep down, lost in thoughts, going thru tremendous pain. Myself also going thru same.Best way you can avoid pain is keep watching breath or sensation all the time. Don't think at all.

I gauged new depth of Vipassana this time. I learned to see the thing the way they are. No more emotional way of looking at it. 

"Yes Dhammo Sanantano..." Few Pali references.

When one is in meditation time fly and when you are out for break time is slow. You drink water from tap located at this end of centre and go for pissing to that end of centre only 3 minutes passes :-)
You don't want to stay in room. your own thoughts scare you. Since mind is in deep meditation and don't need sleep, there might be sleepless nights as well.

Best way is to 

- Walk all the time by looking 4 feet down road ahead. Do not look at anyone, do not look any scenery as well. 
- Mind need something to generate new thoughts to derail you. It also help to become silent, more silent you are better 
  work you will do and hence more the gains.
- Take a very less food. 2 chapatis are enough for day to pass, Don't eat rice.
- Take break after each 55 minutes. Don't wait time to pass rather spend time in meditation.
- Take rest after lunch, try to lie down, go into "Anapana."
- Less thought better for you. Lesser input, mind stays small "Sushma", more input it becomes Large "sthula" and 
God save you from him.
- Accept reality the way it surface, Don't react.
- This time I worked till last moment of my stay in there. It was a tremendous gain. 

10th Day After "Mangal Maitri" 10:00 am, we were allowed to talk and I went to meet my wife she was equally feeling blissful.
Did not felt to call anyone for next few hours. Mobiles/Tabs were buzzing around,everyone was just talking, many shockers surface, We realize how selfish we are deep down, we try to apologize for that by calling people.

Vipassana shows you the way really you are. It teaches you to see the things without any projection of mind. 10th day is shock absorb day. You are free to meet all around you in common areas, you can exchange your experiences. still 3 sittings of day are mandatory to attend. Next day (Last day) early morning 4:30 you need to attend last discourse of Guruji which shares tips to make it work for you in practical life. 

One must practice it back home. Its all about practice.


Mangal Ho!

Date: 1 Jan to 11 Jan 2015 as Dhamma Worker
----------------------------------------------------------
Vipassana from a Dhamma Workers perspective:
----------------------------------------------------------

This time went to serve for entire course. Dhamma workers are old timers like teachers and need to serve in every way, ensure discipline in course and attend all the operation issues / students needs etc.

4:00 Ring the bell across campus to wake the students.
4:25 Ring the warning bell for students to proceed towards meditation hall.
4:30 Ensure that no one is missing. Start your own meditation.
Rest schedule remains same as students.

This sounds like easy but understand what could go against you and your plan...

Few students might be missing from compulsory group sittings, 
Give special attention for trouble makers ( Irrespective of repeated warnings few keeps talking, ask irrelevant questions and dilute atmosphere. They will find it hard to meditate and there will lot of things surfacing at bodily and mind level. few can control it and few can not Or do not want to understand...

1. Who follow instructions line by line like nursery kids will have less trouble.
2. Who try to analyze things / rationalize give input to mind and make it gross which is useless for meditation. This group suffers more but they gain also more in long term if they accepts it.
3. Whoever are skeptical and do not understand or try not to understand stay behind and then start comparing with others and make their own mind more gross. They  will not work or will not let others to work.

Mind is worker who will work for you provided you closely monitor it and do not give any food of thoughts. (Sankara's/Actions etc)

Moment one talks, It creates a chain of thoughts, One who keep talking makes his path difficult. I did same in my first course. This mind will not go inward and will create hindrance for oneself.

Very very important - "One should be in noble silence all the time"

Now there will be students who can not focus they will create problems for others. As a Dhamma worker, need to keep eye on them and help them to get back.

Another important learning not all human being are able to do Vipassana. Some will not get breath,
Few will not get sensations (this should not be reason to opt out of practice)

Few will crave for Tobbaco, liquor and will manage to sneak in, thats another good reason to watch for few.

Since from Day 2 onwards things starts coming up on surface , only reason to get triggered is find fault with Dhamma worker in campus who,

1. Disturbs morning sleep. 
2. With Smile force you to work.
3. Only people who look cool are dhamma workers and teacher. One can not blast teacher then dhamma worker are easier to target.

Mind starts creating aversion towards them, So dhamma worker needs to handle the situation very carefully. All meditation breaks are just waiting for bombs to get triggered. Its difficult situation, plus dhamma worker also meditating and if their own Sankara coming on surface then things become more difficult. He need to manage his own stress and serve with smile.

In Breakfast break - prepare for arrangments like prepare buffet table, plates, tumblers,spoons, fruits baskets etc. Ensure to have Drinking Water for students in Meditation Hall. Little cleaning and tidy up things. Have own food after students are done. Serve like mother and keep a watch that all maintain noble silence.

I used to get up with 4:00 am Dong and then stay awake till 11:30 pm. lot many activities to keep myself going. 

Only luxury we had was to have evening snack as new students and on TOP of that a choice to eat dinner at  9:00 pm. We used to opt for glass of milk. 

1. Contagious diseases like Cold, cough will trouble a lot. Keep yourself warm and try stay away from cold. 
2. Avoid debating teachers on philosophy. It does not help any way.
3. Body pain and insane, irrelevant thoughts are seen across all the students. Irrespective of whatever you do, you need to face music. Cushion, back rest does not help, they are just there to fool your mind.
4. Do not sit showing your legs towards dhamma seats. You might be returning metta given to you.
5. Do not stomp on others seat, neither sit on them. Its operation table, dont know what you will 
catch from it.
6. Do not touch / Shake hands with others even on metta day.
7. Try to talk less on metta day. Keep phone calls at minimum.
8. Go directly to home, avoid crowded places / pilgrimages etc.
9. Eat healthy diet, body tries to gain its weight, help it.

10. Panchshila's are of utmost importance try not to break them. Keep meditating every day.

 Satipatthana - 18th to 26th Sept 2015- Bangalore

Today is Oct 7, writing the experiences of Satipatthana after 2 weeks. 

Satipatthana is checkpoint for Vipassana. Now the real journey begins. This was different experience in every sense. I started from home by 3:00 and with lot of home sickness. That Sankara stayed for a long time but eventually it also passed away. Lord Ganesha arrived day before yesterday, I helped Anjali for all preparation, It was heavy on both of us to leave the home. I learned meaning of Nekkhamma (renunciation).

He was prince, left his palace in search of finding way of out of suffering. All suffers from these internal enemies. 
I do not have any problem, why I do this ? Its good way to remove unnecessary baggage and make mind more light and sharp. Its working no doubt but how many time I will keep going like this ? Am I still trying to prove my way?
1000 of such questions which are nothing but Mind trying to jeopardize the process. After all he don't like idea of himself getting worked. 

I reached Dhamma Home by 4:00, It was drizzling adding more dampness to depressed mind. After doing paper work and 
formality I expressed that I can do Seva in case need arise. I knew that when we do Seva we need to run around things so its like lighter version of Tapa. Mind trying all possible way to trick. I also mentioned that keep me as backup.
Room 24 got assigned So far only 18 reported. Satipatthana is serious course as all are old timers. Meet Babu sir he was there to see off his wife. Meet one person whose wife was pregnant and he wanted her to attend the course. Dhamma is given to child while its in womb. What a noble way ! he find still he is inside only. Journey is inward only. This guy also want to give limited seva of 3 days which teacher did not allowed. Manohar was our Dhamma Sevak.

Made few calls to home, friends that I will be off for another 8 days. Luggage was left in room. Had a good khichadi pongal type rice as dinner. I knew now next few days I will not be able to have evening food there. Anjali has given stock of cookies which I asked Prasad to distribute among the students. subsequent 2-3 days saw similar in breakfast which were voluntarily declared later by students.

Few of us were first timers for Satipatthana, I felt newbie feeling, Course book and notes and pen were provided in case one want to note down things. Rakesh gave his English version of book to me, I had mine in hindi version. I make it a point that I have both version of discourses, this time I attended Hindi version of discourses but felt English version are much better. Process Is Vipassana only but with more dedication. Aanapana was given as usual and Silence started by 7:00 pm. 

It was difficult. Mind was pulling down with home sick feeling. Pain started surfacing already, I need to go like this for another 8 days. Will I survive the ordeal?

I slept well, got up before dong. After morning freshment started walking towards the meditation hall, closed eyes. 
In satipatthana there is chanting of Satipatthana sutta by Guruji from 5:00 to 6:30 am. Other than that whole process is same. Nishkamji is our teacher. Always admired his energy as he his 80+ , he can sit in meditation for more than 2 hours in stretch. Lot to learn from him. remembered Rakesh saying that this is serious than 10 days course. 


4:30 realized that I do not have comb - I dont need it.

In past all courses I used to count days and create day in three parts

1. Morning - Tough
2. till 11:00 am - Tougher
3. Afternoon -  Toughest
4. End of day - Look at sky saying you made me proud. 

I came here to get rid of mind patterns but mind keeps creating them. After all thats food for it to survive.

Biggest challenge in vipassana courses is time does not fly if you keep counting the days. You are supposed to be working there all the time. Each breath needs to be observed.

Its easy to meditate but its tougher to be in awareness when you are doing other activities. Mind wants to drag you.

24X7 unlimited Hot water, Excellent quality breakfast and not a single reason in premises to leave but mind wants to 
run away from there on any and every percept. I need comb. I need to eat in evening / night. I need water bottle.
I need to go home. I think I will not able to complete this time. I will update my facebook with status that achieved 
this level of height. No more further courses like this. I want to hug my kids. Is this worth it?

I was at ease regarding the technique but you dont know what surprise your own mind will bring you. Pain is alright but how you deal with surfacing crazy toughts? This time still garbage was much better than past. comparison is nature of mind.

Looking down 4 feet from the feet while walking helps a lot to keep mind from wandering away. Watch sensation on moving parts of body. While eating , bathing, sleeping, toilet all the time. days passes very fast if you practices.Silence is of utmost importance.

Learned this time that there is a Time Wrap in here. 9:00pm to bed and 1:30 you get up. Sleep is complete for body. 1:30 you go into sleeping meditatiion you open your eyes thinking you were into meditation for just 10 min. and see the clock you see 3:30am. 

Its been almost every day I am getting up by 2:00 am and then till 4:00 am into sleeping meditation. Entire day feels fresh. Food intake is 2 chapathis, 2 small half filled bowls of subzi and little rice with salad. Evening I used to get 2 chapatis with one bowl of subzi as per request to teacher. I lost 1Kg. 

Techniq is wonderful mind is a elephant which needs to be trained slowly. Metta day I cried, thinking all this time this intelligence is within me and I am looing for it in books,temples,teachers. Felt very light, like some burden is gone past. Metta day Ego takes over. Meet one person who attended 60 days course which means he has attended, 2 -45 days courses, few 30days and 20 days and unlimited 10days. Its all about practice. count does not matter infact they add to your ego ( babu sir telling this to me last time)

7th day If I remember correctly, I had a post lunch nap and sudden jolt woke me up. I keeps getting these at home, what are these, Lets go and ask teacher.  But whats point he would anyway say Aniccha is there just passes away. But atleast ask him. Is this mind tricking again to pass the time to ask questions ? 11:00 to 11:30 goes in lunch but 11:30 to 1:00 is a challenging as you are resting and do not know what to do. How long one can do meditation? 24hours.
Went to teacher asked him that I get these jolts all the time and is this part of process ? He asked me if I am attending first time? and said ignore it. Its just Ego trying to take over. Just watch objectively  that this also passes away. 

I remembered why I write this blog? Was I scared back then when I started this? Its my logbook of transformation.

One day I thought to check how much KM I take a walk here. Went all the way to dining hall to measure steps I take from dinning hall to room. and then from meditation hall to room and like that created entire days schedule of coming and going back. It showed that I walk on average 5km minimum in entire day with natural sunlight and 100% oxygen. I dropped the idea of walking barefoot as there were 100 types of crawling ant, insects, grasshoppers, cockroaches, snail etc were there. 

How this intelligence governs this complex world and their interaction ? Eckhat tolle was also reminded me to see a flower which was so beautiful and complete in every sense. who was watching at it ? Mind or awareness?

This dhamma hall is right near a village so all types of sounds distract there and its real test for meditators to ignore them. One Cock cook-okcook entire day morning afternoon and evening. I wanted to find him/her. Kannada Ganesha tournaments announcements, Masjid doing ajan. 5:30 morning factory doing alarm. birds chirping, rain and so many things. plus your own mind creating 1000 of different thoughts over it. -- Bhav, becoming becoming...

After 2-3 weeks I am able to recall all that I could. Came home in saturday evening attended Aarti. I felt much ease.

22 March 2016 - Changes in me.
------------------

I am still on the path. This blog was written for me by me to check on me.  Current experiences

- No matter what I sit few minutes daily. Ideal day will be having 1 hr morning and 1 hr before bed.
- Wife started practising on her own and elder son also started doing 10 min anapana as per his need. ( 
During Exam and when his mind is agitated) 
- Mother look forward to sit near me when I am meditating.
- Unpleasant incidences are not much happening around or did I changed and do not attract them ? Even if something happens I find some one some how pulling me out of it.Its like some unknown hands taking care all the time are more visible.
- I am watchful of myself all the time. Thoughts have reduced.
- Small changes in eating, sleep , reading pattern make the difference. ( eggs, Movies etc)
- Do not like Crowded places and Drunk people around. But No hatred as well.
- Dhamma works and takes care of everything. 
- Good audio books / discourses / people are coming into life, Feels like Nature is nurturing my dream.
- Sabka mangal ho feeling (Metta) is growing.
- I am more careful while giving free advises, I hear a lot that they felt happy while talking to me.

- I, Me are reducing. well that is the plan.

Jan 4th 2017 to 15 Jan 2017 Wife attended her third course in Bangalore. Dhamma takes care of everything. 

Nov 23 , 2022

Still on the PATH Mangal ho